A Gentle Reminder From Pope Francis

This life will go by fast.

Don’t fight with people, don’t criticize your body so much, don’t complain so much.

Don’t lose sleep over your bills. Look for the person that makes you happy. If you make a mistake, let it go and keep seeking your happiness.

Never stop being a good parent. Don’t worry so much about buying luxuries and comforts for your home, and don’t kill yourself trying to leave an inheritance for your family. Those benefits should be earned by each person, so don’t dedicate yourself to accumulating money.

Enjoy, travel, enjoy your journeys, see new places, give yourself the pleasures you deserve. Allow dogs to get closer. Don’t put away the fine glassware. Utilize the new dinnerware; don’t save your favorite perfume, use it to go out with yourself; wear out your favorite sport shoes; repeat your favorite clothes.

So what? That’s not bad. Why not now? Why not pray now instead of waiting until before you sleep? Why not call now? Why not forgive now? We wait so long for Christmas; for Friday; for Reunions; for another year; for when I have money; for love to come; when everything is perfect…look…

Everything perfect doesn’t exist. Human beings can’t accomplish this because it simply was not intended to be completed here. Here is an opportunity to learn.

So take this challenge that is life and do it now…love more, forgive more, embrace more, love more intensely and leave the rest in God’s hands. Amen.

Four Older Italian Ladies

These four older ladies who lived in Naples, Italy, usually sat outside together near the church and chatted about when they were younger.

One month ago they pooled their money together and bought a laptop.

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Never having been to, but having heard all about Florida, they just happened to click on St. Augustine, Florida.

They read all about the Fountain of Youth, claimed by the Spaniards when they arrived there.

They collected up all they had left and sent for four bottles of the water.

As soon as it arrived, they drank as directed.

The rest of this story will make you a believer, because here they are today…

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No. This is TRUE! Really!

Would we lie to you?

We have a limited supply of this water available at an incredibly low price of just $199.95 a bottle Plus S & H and a separate fee.

Seriously. Hurry before the inventory runs out!

Make checks payable to: Republican National Committee.

You can trust us: You know we would NEVER lie to you, especially about your healthcare or your taxes.

Bad Parrot

Parrot

BAD PARROT

A young man named Ron received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

Ron tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to ‘clean up’ the bird’s vocabulary. 

Finally, Ron was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. Ron shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even more rude. Ron, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, Ron quickly opened the door to the freezer.. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Ron’s outstretched arms and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.

Ron was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude.

As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, very softly. 

“May I ask what the turkey did?”